Monday, February 14, 2011

To Straighten or Clean, That is the Question

"Life is full of interruptions and complications."
~Love Actually

I have been a horrible, horrible blog poster.

I always kind of chuckle to myself when I see these kinds posts on other people's blogs. Whether it's "Kids 1 and 2 have been miserably sick" or "I was out of town and buried with work," I can't help but think, oh I am sure they have 5 minutes here or there to post something for us loyal readers!

Now, here is me: eating my proverbial words.

My life has been all sorts of crazy since the New Year. A new job, a new schedule, new friends and new extracurricular items have all combined into the perfect storm of me becoming utterly overwhelmed by the sheer thought of logging online when I arrive home in the evening or on the weekends.

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The new schedule really isn't even the issue, however. I have found myself feeling this panicky urge to clean, straighten and cook whenever I have a moment to myself at home. It's gotten to the point where I have noticed that I just can't sit still sometimes. It's exhausting. By all means, that pot can NOT sit dirty one last second, and the counters need a good wipe-down. And that pile of papers needs filing before I can start in on the endless TiVo shows.  I have been scheduling every moment of my life, and am finding it difficult to zone out with no agenda. Even when I am reading a magazine here and there, my mind is racing with other things I need to get done.

Why can't I just ignore the daily clutter and mess for a little while, and take some time for ME? And if I can take time for me, surely I can take a few minutes and plug out a good blog post while I am at it!

I am struggling with my own inner control of my OCD tendencies. While I have not been officially diagnosed, and sometimes joke about it in jest, the symptoms are there for what is likely a mild case. I think this urge to clean and straighten is my mind's way of responding to the build-up of daily stressors, whether it's traffic or what to make for dinner. It's the urge to take control of a situation immediately, even if that "situation" ends up being the Tupperware cabinet. I have some ideas for how to tame it (daily and weekly goals and To-Do's, specific times of the week when I should clean and when I should relax, etc.) and also some ideas for how to work in more ME time.

In the meantime, I try and visualize what my ideal blogging situation would be -- a lovely evening spent at home (while watching all those recorded TiVo shows, of course!) on the couch, blogging away on my brandy-new Mac laptop.
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Unfortunately, that particular "motivator" purchase may need to wait until post-taxes :P

Do you find it difficult to take a time-out in your life? How do you work in that so-important time for yourself amidst the natural craziness of life?



Lauren said...

I definitely struggle with this myself, but I have the opposite problem. I am so overwhelmed, I cannot bring myself to clean or do laundry or straighten up, so things quickly get out of control and cause even more work. I don't have a solution, so if you figure it out, let me know!! (PS I think my federal return is also going to a new MacBook!! :) )

Unknown said...

Lauren - its so good to hear others struggle with similar issues! Everyone is different and deals with stress/busy schedules differently. Can't wait to have MacBook parties with you too, btw :)